NZ Born Samoans Vs Fresh Samoans - What is behind the rivalry?

Last week, I attended a two day training workshop that was aimed at introducing a new model, for The Department of Corrections staff to engage with Pasefika people called the 'Fauina o le Fale'(The Art of Constructing a Samoan House/Fale). It is the first of it's kind created by the Department, having acknowledged that there is a gap in its tools and approaches to counter an ever growing Pasefika representation within New Zealand's Criminal population. Pacific populations are over-represented within the NZ Criminal Justice System, despite making up only 7% of the total population. Pacific peoples make up 11.6% of the total prison population and approximately 10.7% of offenders serving community based sentences and orders.(All public information). So this is a much welcomed initiative.

However, this blog post is not to focus on the bearings of the model, but rather one concept that it suggested for considerations, which stood out for me. The model outlines a conception that there was/is a rivalry between New Zealand born Samoans and Samoans born and raised in Samoa. Having experienced this first hand, and being a Samoan born and raised in Samoa, I thought, it was an issue worth bringing to light.

My New Zealand born colleagues from across the country who attended, certainly had a lot to share about their experiences of being discriminated against simply because they were not born in their parent's country of birth. So I did a bit of research and asked some people. Most reported of discrimination which occurred mostly during times when they visited Samoa. Most pointed out that the judgement was mostly from family members residing on island and some locals who may have sniffed that they were fresh 'mosquito meat'. Reponses to queries of where they were from weren't always received well. "Oh? So you're from NZ huh?". Others reported being thrown stones at and being mocked when they decided to go for walks on the streets. Some recalled getting the complete shut down when they offered to help out with the 'umu' or other family activities. "It's ok, just go inside and leave it to us". What is really wrong about this picture (for me at least); is not so much the physical manifestations of the acts of discernment but rather the concept that another Samoan should be discriminated against simply because they were born outside of Samoa! That it was somehow their fault that their parents decided to move to NZ for better opportunities and made the cardinal sin of conceiving and giving birth to them in NZ instead of Samoa. I found this revelation quite alarming.

When NZ born Samoans travel to Samoa, it is usually for a holiday or their parents forced them to attend a cultural event -fa'alavelave. Either the funeral of someone they barely knew or the Title Bestowal ceremony for a distant relative or even their parents. Most try to make the most of the opportunity to learn more about their parent's birth country, and the country that they're so closely linked to no matter where they were born or where they lived. You see whenever a NZ born Samoan is asked for their ethnicity, they will always identify as Samoans. Not a NZ Samoan, Pacific Islander or other. It will always be - SAMOAN. There is no other category for half and halves. You are either one or another.

AFA KASI/ HALF CASTE

I cannot begin to imagine what it may be like for my fellow NZ born Samoans to go experience this ill treatment, but can understand where they are coming from. You see, the same can be said for Afa kasi or half caste Samoans, or Samoans born out of inter-racial marriages or unions, between full blooded Samoans and Europeans who first made contact with Samoa in the 18th Century. I too am a product of this half caste category of people. A term that is now considered racist in the modern world. Like my NZ born Samoan brothers and sisters, I too have experienced direct discriminating statements with reference to my racial background. "Afa kasis, they don't know the culture, they do their own thing as they please". Or one I've heard directed at my father many a times by my mothers family (in times of conflict), was "Le Afa Kasi le popoi (the rude afa kasi)". Usually these notions were directed at Afa Kasis because they tend to behave a different way and still do. If you were looking from outside the box, you would notice that this group of people, often associated with others like themselves, (mostly because there is a lot of inter-marriages within the group). Nowadays, not so much the case anymore. Most Afa Kasi, like myself, are well integrated into their Fa'a Samoa. Serving the chiefs of their families, their villages and churches in whatever way that is expected of any normal Samoan. Most of these so called 'Afa Kasi's' and I pride myself and my family on belonging to this percentage, are well versed in both worlds. Traditionally sensitive to the expectations of a much subjective culture and equally accepting of the rationale behind westernised concepts, traditions and lifestyles. We proudly walk the two worlds without fear of crossing into the other, as our Samoan lineage runs just as strong and deep as any other Samoan. Our ancestral links or gafa is as rich as it gets with links to the four pillars of Samoan royal heritage. And because we too serve our matais, villages and our families; just like any other Samoan family, we make it our business to learn our heritage and ancestral links at least five generations back. We teach our children and pass on stories of lineage links to them for their knowledge and to nourish, as our heritage is our Mea Sina/treasure. It is who we are. It is where we are from. It is our identity. Like the NZ born Samoans, we too identify as SAMOANS. Our Birth Certificates, Pass ports, and all identification boldly states that we are Samoan. Not Half Caste, Not Part German, or Part Samoan, just SAMOAN.

In saying all this, lets now turn the tables and picture this, a Samoan from Samoa arrives onto New Zealand/ Tangata Whenua land for the first time and what happens? We are called FOBS - Fresh Off The Boat, a most derogatory term, that I despise with a passion. Second to that, we are called 'Coconuts'. We meet our NZ born cousins, and well some are friendly and some are just right out standoffish and reserved. Not very hospitable and not very welcoming at all. The tension is often as thick as a loaf of bread (the tanks made in Samoa). The wayward looks are often indiscreet and without any efforts for subtlety. You read their statuses on face book referring to Samoans from Samoa as FOBS, they bloody use the term far too loosely for my liking. If you happen to work in a workplace with some, you often get questions like "Do you have any air conditioning in Samoa?", or "How come your English is good? Did you go to school in Samoa or were you education else where?". "Are you sure you're from Samoa?, Cos you sure don't sound like it". If it's within a family setting, when something goes missing, you often hear them enquire about whereabouts of the Samoan from Samoa first before anyone else. The list of examples go on and on, and on, both sides of the coin.

I say there is most certainly a rivalry between the two groups of Samoans, with the main distinction of the differences in places of birth and the environments in which the two were raised. How or when exactly did it all start? I don't have the answer to it. I do believe however, that the rivalry is not so much geographical based, but more around common human flaws. The real problem is a matter of attitudes, by way of both groups turning their 'noses down' on each other. It is a pure matter of insolence and arrogance between the two groups. One strives to outdo the other and be perceived as the better of the two. There's an unspoken unhealthy competition between the two groups. What they fail to see is that both are treating the other exactly as they do not want to be treated.

BUILD A BRIDGE

A bridge will have to be built. There's many bridges that can be constructed, and in many different ways and levels. You could start simply with yourself. As a Samoan from Samoa, I initially struggled to work in a professional environment with my NZ born Samoan colleagues. At first I could feel that unspoken tension, or was it just me? I had to ask myself to step back and look at the situation from a fresh pair of eyes. Was I perhaps carrying with me the insecurities and common assumptions of my Samoan upbringing and how NZ born Samoans were normally regarded there and thus affecting the way I interacted with them in general, and vice versa? I think my colleagues and I made the conscious effort to get to know each others' worlds from then on. And that's all there really is to it. It's about getting know the people and the person first, before the popular assumptions you're so used to take over. When you do that, you bridge that rivalry gap. You come to respect the other person sitting across from you. I most certainly learned that my NZ born Samoan colleagues, friends and relatives, could do a lot of Fa'a Samoa processes a lot better than me. Some could do the Folafolaga like it was no body's business. Others could lalaga the ie toga and cook Samoan unique dishes, things that I refuse to learn really. And together we mended the gap by sharing our knowledge, our experiences and learning with each other, weaving (or lagalaga)our own newly refined mat. A mat where discussions are open, where respect is awarded no matter where you were born, where mutual interests and va fealoai (sacred space of respectful boundaries)is practised and lineage is acknowledged and respected, no matter where you were born, or who your ancestors blood lines came from. On this mat, we are equal men and women with strong pride for their country. On this mat, we are all Samoans.

My 9 tips to keeping stress at bay!

Okay, this is not a lecture. :) I just want to share something that's helped me to kick some bad habits that were bringing me down and leading me to a harmful pattern of emotional eating as a coping mechanism!

1. No matter how much work you have to do; MAKE time for Your wellbeing, health and peace of mind. (Notice that I wrote MAKE instead of FIND time). The work will still be there tomorrow - you'll be more refreshed and stronger to tackle it then than now. An hour of your time to walk/run (whatever busts your bubble) won't hurt.

2. Surround yourself with positive, like minded people. Negativity will drag you down to the ground and do nothing to enhance your personal growth. Positive people, think positive, support you, encourage you, inspire you, make you smile and forget the worries of the world.

3. Have a little fun. Whatever you like to do. Do it! We only live once. Just make sure it's nothing illegal! Lol!

4. DO NOT procrastinate! It's a great agent for stress and unnecessary pressure! Prioritise, strategise, and get things done when they're meant to be done! Work smarter not harder!

5. Delegate! I've learned (as a mother of 5) that I can't do everything on my own! Delegate chores in your home. Delegate responsibilities - it's a great way for your teens and your husband to step up and pull their weight around the house! If they don't - hold them to it! Don't try and be a Heroine/Hero - you'll end up either hospitalised or replaced! LOL!

6. Persistency! Set goals and systems and follow it through!

7. YOU time! Make sure there's always quiet time for you! To think, to pray to be in sync with your inner souls and mind! Very soothing and therapeutic!

8. TLC - I know there's a lot of FUN you things on this List! That's the whole point! Take care of #1 first and the rest will fall through! Usually! :) My idea of TLC - girl time!! i round up my girls! My friends and cuzzies, we laugh and bitch and vent and do what girls do best - F. U. N!

9. Family! Of everything - time with my family, is priceless! Turn off your phone (I'm still learning this one), just be with them. I love my time with my kids and my mom. Hearing what the kids have to say about their day. Silently holding hands and watching TV with my husband! BLISS! That's what I try to do to stay afloat and to keep going everyday and keep stress at bay! :) Hope it helps anyone!

Reviews of a Social Butterfly!

PI don't normally do briefs. Not my style. I'm a creature of habits so this is breaking the norm. Which I've recently learned, is not a bad thing. We develop from new experiences. 

Anyway, it's been a while since my last post...NO thanks to my broadband provider, and because I've been busy with the children's school holidays, well writing had to take the back burner. Thus I'm resorting to brief accounts of events that have kept me busy and away from my ink. Besides, when you're posting from your iPhone, one must be innovative. (This is already too long).

Richard Parker Show:

I attended the Richard Parker concert with my husband and some friends two weeks ago. Richard Parker is the 'R. Kelly' or 'Brian McKnight' of Samoa. Performance - 5 stars. That deep rich voice always mets a girl's heart. And the men get extra special attention behind closed doors. Venue - nestled in the middle of the Otara Town Centre the venue has seen its fair share of publicity on violent brawls. When the show started, the VIP area became everyone's area - so Venue and security - 2. There were backup dancers on stage, which was a good change for an island concert but because it was such a small stage, the dancers were lost in the performance. I don't think anyone paid attention to their swirling. Overall I rated the event a 3 out of 5.

That's me (Tall Beyonce lol) with my friend Lizz. 

Fundraising

Prior to my Richard Parker outing, I hosted a fundraiser for my family, by bringing out my apron and capitalising on my mad cutlery skills. I've never really had much experience with fundraising until I moved to NZ. At least on a personal level. It's a huge thing for Pacific Island ethnicities. As well as Maori and European cultures. It's almost like a 'kiwi' thing! See the thing about fundraising that I've learned is this; you fundraise, you better make sure that you return the favour to those who supported you and vice versa! Failing to do so, will not go well in your favour should you have another fundraiser event! Second, if you're going to have suppers, please and I stress P L E A S E don't deliver! You end up using a good majority of your funds raised to pay for petrol. Thirdly, don't take any orders on the day! But this is hard when you're Samoan, you may end up without any clients. Samoans like to order last minute! Be honest! 

This was followed by a Social Fundraiser by one of the classes for one of my old schools - St. Joseph's College Samoa. I got to do the wanna be Beyonce on the dance floor with this beauty! 

Miss Samoa 2013:

I know that I'm not going to win any votes with this one, but hey, I'm not really one to go for the 'popular opinion'. I like to follow my instincts and listen to what my head and heart says. Regardless of the majority opinion. So family, spare me the argument! I just managed to watch the full show on DVD last week. So this subject may be a little behind in timing, but what I have to say is crucial. The crowned winner was/is stunningly beautiful. Without a doubt. However, I felt upon watching the DVD that someone else deserved the crown and title just a tad bit more. My choice for Ms Samoa, had I been invited to Judge, would have been Ms Mahealani! She was breathtakingly beautiful. She alone had a most evocative, honest and intelligent answer to her question at the interview. She didn't stumble on the way, didn't take much time to think through what she had to say and she answered with confidence and poise. A mark that we want to see on all our modern Samoan young women. Yes her talent needed a bit of work, but the message behind her story was raw and honest and something that most young Samoans can relate to but have no experience on how to express or manage - seeing as mental illness and depression is almost non-existent in the Fa'a Samoa. (Samoan Way). She would have made an outstanding role model for young modern Samoans. We need modern thinkers to move our nation forward and on bar with the rest of world. Especially where tourism is involved. (But that's another story and I don't want to piss off too many people all at once). 

Family Surprises:

I love surprises! I'm an only child. So my cousins are pretty much the closest thing I have to a sibling. Some I get along with, for some it's a struggle, and then there's a small circle of those that I've made a deep connection with, my soul mate, my doppelgänger. That person that you can tell everything and anything to... And when you're with them you can't stop talking about your lives, your thoughts, your worries and joys. The person that you want to share everything with, the one that is not afraid to scold you when you've gone astray, advise you, motivate you, and celebrate your successes and joys with you! The only one who knows all of your deep dark thoughts and secrets (because they're too much to bear on your own). The first person that you want to pick up the phone and call when you have some gossip or venting topic to discuss! That person that you could just pick up where you left off, no matter how long or how far apart you become, because there is no real distance between you but a vast ocean. That person, that I would easily and gladly call my sister any day. Well her husband must have tired of our midnight chats on viber, because he whisked her away to NZ for her 33rd Birthday and I had the most immense pleasure of celebrating with her and having some good long conversations over cocktails and even enjoyed some great nights in the City of Sails with another close sissy cuzzie of mine. Count yourself blessed if you have one of these people in your life! 

Well that's it for this social butterfly. its back to cooking dinners and making kids' lunches and getting up early for work! Love every minute of it. 

That's it for now, this iPhone post is getting way too long and I've had my first Taekwon-do class today and that was some a$$ kicking stuff! Xxx