When I checked my blog this morning, I noticed that my last post was a little over a month ago! Goodness gracious! Life has been busy lately. The word 'busy' doesn't really do much justice to the literal happenings of my life in the past two months. Sleep was reduced from 8 hours to 2 - 3 hours a night, project meetings progressed from once a week to three nights a week, balancing work and my personal commitments with family obligations became a juggling game. Whilst three balls were in the air, two had to be carefully and precisely prepared to fly into the air, whilst a platform had to be ready to catch the others and the cycle would continue! You might be wondering, what on earth is she talking about?
Well, three months ago, I was approached with a proposal to use my skills and experience with media work, to assist the Marist Brothers Old Pupils’ Association – MBOPA Samoa NZ Organising Committee with its work, by promoting and coordinating all things media related for the association. (I know, please try and bear with the acronyms).
I loved the idea and was/is extremely ecstatic. I have been waiting for 14 years for an opportunity, for the right time and right ingredients to position myself in a place where and time where I can give back to a school that had changed so much for me and my fates. You see, if something felt right, I always go with my gut instinct. I thought it would be the ideal chance that I had been waiting for…it was my opportunity to give back to a school that I held very close to my heart.
(Although I didn’t spend more than just a year with Marist St. Joseph’s College, the school has done so much for me and my current future). Now here’s the part where things are going to start to get a tad bit personal, but in this story, it’s inevitable. The information I’m about to depart with, is known to many, yet few, and extremely sensitive to me and my family, but is the ‘essence’ of my history with Marist St.Joseph’s College.
At the age of 17, I was older and more matured than my years. Perhaps too much for my own good. I wouldn’t be the first, but still in the eyes of Samoan society, teenage pregnancies were very much ostracized and not many sympathise with the young girls who found themselves in those circumstances, (however unfortunate it was for their young lives or the social circumstances which may have led them down that path). It was and still can be a cruel reality of the societies that we live in. Anyways, back then the colleges I had attended didn’t have a Form 6 or Year 13 level, which meant I had to complete this year at a Catholic school that facilitated this need in order to transit to University entrance preparatory year or Form 7.
It had to be a Catholic school, I had never been educated elsewhere, and despite my un-catholic ordeal, it was still very important to complete my education in the Catholic Faith. Well, the one school which was most appropriate (and I’m not going to name the school here as I’ve moved on from that whole episode), turned me down. The exact words of a member of the cloth on the board (which got back to my family, Samoa being such a small place) were that ‘damaged females should not mix with girls’.
We thought it would be the end of my short educational life (at least in Samoa) being an only child, meant there was no way my Father would let me move to a relative in New Zealand or elsewhere to complete my education. We lost hope, until somehow, Brother Kevin O’Malley Principal of Marist St. Joseph’s College, had somehow seen the School Certificate National results and somehow heard that one of the students with the leading national English Marks was not fated to complete Year 13 level.
And that’s how it all started.
For the first time in Marist St. Joseph’s History, a teenage mother was accepted into the school. Brother Kevin met with my family and I, he sent tutors home for private tutoring for each of my five main subjects. I had my first born in April, and I was back to school in June for the second term. I remember asking him, “Will it be okay for me to wear mufti?” He replied matter-of-factly, “Why would you?” I remember searching his face for more but there was only fact. “You’ll be a student, just like everyone else,” he said.
Well, it wasn’t really the case at first. The younger boys caught on with the gossip pretty fast, and my first month at school was a little purgatory on earth. Whispers, wayward looks, and outright smart remarks and name calling, I was dubbed ‘mom’ and I would bend my head and quicken my steps home (We lived just ten minutes from the school). Even my own relatives at the school didn’t want to be associated with me, for fear of shame from others. Some seriously considered changing their last names from mine. (Yeah, we can’t always choose family can we).
I remember considering quitting many times. But I also loved learning and studying and getting past each hurdle till I get to the next. My love of the academic arts surpassed it all. So I persevered and surprisingly for me, my class mates made it worth my while.
All the boys in my class were super supportive. Once they got to know me, they became my fierce protectors. The younger ones no longer dared to call me names, they had been warned against it, that doing so would result in a painful experience. Back then, you never saw of those ‘painful’ experiences. Before I knew it, I was one of them. I had many girlfriends, I attract girls like magnets to a fridge. But the truth is, what really got me through that year, was the support and respect of the boys in my class. One of them passed away earlier this year, Dr. Mika Ah Koui, we spent many days together in biology and chemistry labs. (RIP old friend).
The year went by, I participated in various school activities, sports, athletics, cultural activities, choir, and went on field trips, and a whole lot of afterschool getaways. Yes, I became like any other student. Young as I was, my parents had taken over the rearing of my child, and being first time grandparents, they really didn’t care anymore what I did with myself, as long as I came home, attended school and went onto greener pastures. And of course there was that very Samoan concept, that the baby was now theirs, and I was to just continue with school.
Thinking back to it now, I realise how privileged I had been to have my family, parents, friends and the support of the boys in my class, eventually the school, all of my teachers and Br. Kevin O’Malley. (Which was not always the case for many teenage mothers in Samoa at that time). Had I not been given that support, who knows what would have happened to me. I would have had to deal with being a mother, when I was still trying to find myself as a young adult and woman. I shudder at the idea, that I could have gone another path, had it not been for my Marist SJC school.
Later that year, I passed and graduated with very good marks (despite a lot of fooling around just like any normal teenager would at their last year of school). In fact, I was just one point off from first overall in History from the boy (another friend) who took the first place trophy. (I personally think the male teacher could have added an extra mark for my essay but hey I didn’t care, I had 96 out of a 100). When the Pacific Senior School Certificate PSSC results came out the next year, out of some 45 girls from our year, only 11 made the cut. Yours’ truly was one of them. I couldn’t believe it. It was surreal, to be able to go through that year, to stand up after a fall, carry on, be normal again, and come out on top. What a year that was for me! My parents were extremely proud. I owed it to Br. Kevin, to the whole school, that I did not use the opportunity in vain. I will be forever grateful.
Later on, I went on to work as a journalist at the Samoa Observer, whilst I was studying towards a double Major in Law and Journalism, at the University of the South Pacific – Alafua, (like I said, my Daddy could never let me go). I passed my Certificate in Criminal Law. I went on to work at various newspapers including Newsline and Talamua before I went on to Television, with the State owned SBC TV One and Radio. (All the while I was studying part time at the University). From there I went on to work at the Legislative Assembly – Parliament of Samoa, at the Hansard Department, simultaneously translating/interpreting live Parliamentary debates into English, translating all Samoan Hansard records, assisting with translations of legislations, etc. I was there for a year, when I was selected Media Officer for an all new Executive Team for the Samoa Football Soccer Federation. (I was on my second year of law school by then). It was six months into that role, when we received news, that we were successful in the Quota ballot scheme for Permanent Residence in NZ, 2009. We paid everything and made the move – and here I am.
With the move, I decided I needed to do something different, using my transferrable skills, of report writing, researching, alysing, writing proposals, facilitating, presentation skills, people skills, understanding legislation and laws, and my passion for working with people without a voice, and making a difference in their lives. So I changed career paths, and applied to be a Probation Officer with the Department of Corrections. Where a lot of report writing is what I do, as well as making a difference in peoples’ lives, by working together with other community and government agencies to manage their sentences in the community and formulate counter plans to reduce their reoffending and risks in the community and hopefully create long lasting changes in their behaviours and mind sets. Studies are still on my list of things to do, (I’m still young, still four more years of study left in me), but for now, my children are my priority.
But, as with any writer, my love for the ink and words, is perhaps the strongest force in my life and being. I will always go back to writing, no matter what. Thus, here’s my story. Vulnerable, exposed, wide open book for all to see, but like I always say to my offenders, the ability to show vulnerability takes courage, strength and a lot of guts. Some of the best writers in history, are the best because they wear their hearts on their sleeves.
Next week on the 25th of December, we will have been married for 10 years and together for 12. We have been blessed with five children. My eldest son and second born child, is named after Br. Kevin. Kevin, is a highly active sports athlete, with what appears to be a promising rugby athletics career in front of him, with the right attitude and support. My first born is now in College, and she is inspiration itself to me. Actively participates in all sports, and at the very top of her academic studies and class. The younger three are no different. Each child unique and gifted. I have been truly blessed. The fates and God have blessed me, with at first a rocky, challenging and trying beginning, but I have learned, it’s our trials that make us strong. I’ve adapted a lot of resilience, I am much stronger when life throws me hurdles, my Dad passed away last year, but I am still moving on. With a supportive husband, healthy beautiful children, caring family – it’s not the beginning that counts, its how you finish!
My MARIST experience taught me to strive for the best no matter what life throws at you, you get up and you keep fighting, keep on striving, and eventually all good things come to those who work hard.
MARIST MAKING LEADERS:
So from the 9th of December - 14th of December, we celebrated 50 years of MBOPA Samoa NZ existence in New Zealand, as well as a continued celebration of the 125 years of Marist Brothers' presence and contribution to education in Samoa. The original organising committee consisted of 18 males, and one female, myself. Yet another first for me and Marist history itself. According, to the Organising Committee Chairman Faimalo Allan Stowers, it was the first time that a former female student, was involved on that level, in MBOPA Samoa NZ activities. I am extremely humbled by this opportunity. Many of my lady friends often asked me, "How do you do it?" Referring of course to juggling a highly demanding job, family and then being the only female amongst a group of men. I always said, the hard part was juggling family, job and committee obligations, the latter was the fun part. (grinning from ear to ear). No seriously, for some women, being alone with a bunch of men, can be quite overwhelming, and not at all comforting. But, I think I owe it to being an only child, I sometimes find myself in my element at the most unorthodox of places and situations. (grinning). And well, to be fair, when you have a good mix of people in the group, it makes a huge difference.
It was truly a unique experience and one that I will do over and over again, and will not change a single thing about it. It started from working on the Media Team for the committee in coordinating articles for mainstream and social media networks, and later on I ended up taking on Secretarial roles, some negotiating on behalf of the Committee and organising activities and liaising on behalf of the men where a woman's touch would be more effective than a man's voice. It was a lot of fun. Challenges I think came in the sense, that sometimes men being men, can forget that a woman has a voice, and an opinion, and that regardless of age or status I was not there as a woman, I was there as a member of a fraternity that I too belonged to with just as much right as any other man.
It was a learning experience. I worked alongside some hardworking, driven and passionate, successful in their own right, men. Who would always take criticism and turn it into a positive. I felt the MARIST SPIRIT there stronger than ever. There was always a strong sense of pride, an essence of brotherhood and belonging to the same family. If there was anything that I would have liked to add to the experience, it would have been to see more former female students involved. But we understand that it's still early days for MBOPA in NZ let alone, female students involved in any Marist activities. If you're reading this and you're a former female student, ladies, I challenge you, don't just turn up to the functions and siva's, I would really like to see more female students involved in our body meetings, decision making, organising and development of our association. It is truly an association, that we can proudly call our own and it welcomes each of you with open arms. It is a place where we can make a difference, for our communities and for the future of a school that has done so much for Samoa.
Much has been said about the Marist Brothers' history and its contribution to education in Samoa and to the Marist schools itself. So I will not go into those details. But I would like to re-emphasise what makes us fellow MARISTS so proud to belong to the Marist Family. Malisi has produced leaders for Samoa, currently, the Prime Minister, Chief Justice, Speaker of Parliament, Attorney General and heads of Government Departments, Leaders in the Business sector, Sports Legends are all proud and avid members of the Marist fraternity. In NZ, never before in the history of any other old students association, has there been two of its members serving top diplomatic posts for Samoa simultaneously. The Samoa High Commissioner to New Zealand, HE Afioga Leasi Papali'i Scanlan and Samoa Consular General Afioga Faolotoi Fatialofa Pogi are both avid Marists and patrons of MBOPA in NZ. This is a legacy that we can all be proud of and contribute to its continued success for future generations out of the Marist education system.
Our weeklong celebrations again was the first of its kind to have ever been attempted by MBOPA Samoa NZ. It was a very successful week. Enjoyed by all who attended, and once again the MARIST spirit was always felt throughout all events. We have received countless feedback from our partners and supporters who were extremely happy and pleased with our activities, particularly the spectacular Gala Dinner finale, which saw attendance from 600 people, all 60 tables for 10, sold out. Fine food and wine was always in abundance, and $55,000tala was raised and donated to the Marist School in Samoa to assist with the remaining balance of its' '3 in 1' project, comprising of a Library, Computer Lab and Science Lab, valued at $1.5 million tala, to which $1.1 million tala has already been paid off. It was an extremely proud moment for MBOPA Samoa NZ and the Organising Committee. To have literally started the whole event from nothing, and to end up with all expenses paid for plus a $55k donation. It's an achievement to be commended.
MBOPA Samoa Organising Committee, Chairman Afioga Muliagatele Faimalo Allan Stowers, MBOPA President Leota Saufua, Secretary Fiaai Viaane McCarthy, Vice-President Toe Pa'u, Treasurer Peter Stowers, Pio Henry Soagia, my Media Team Rasmus Pereira, and our newest addition Seumanu Francis Ioane, Lemalu Semo Sititi, Faumui Toleafoa, Ah Chong Sam Chong, Tovi'o Lepou, and my dearest darling husband Lafaitele Danny Leaupepe and our whole committee, Fa'afetai tele lava for the experience. We learn from our shortcomings, we celebrate our achievements and we grow in our passion, commitment and dedication to the Marist Spirit and to ourselves.
Last but no the least, my thanks to my mother, my children and my husband, for your support, your patience, understanding, tolerance and love. Without all of that, I would not have been able to be a part of this special milestone in Marist history.
"Forevermore, Forever Yours, Forever Marist".
